How To Handle A Crying Child

From the moment we bring our baby home from the hospital, there’s crying. At first it’s simply a process of discovering what they need, a change, food, sleep. But over time the reasons our kids cry change and develop. When they cry it may be because they’re sad, angry, scared, anxious or even happy. How we respond to them is important both in stopping the crying and to help them to develop ways to deal with the emotions in the future.

One of the things we shouldn’t do is to tell them not to cry. I know I’ve done it, and in retrospect it’s counterproductive. What we’re doing when we say, “don’t cry,” is that we don’t understand or don’t care about them. It may seem to them that we’re saying their emotions are invalid or unimportant. Even if the reason seems trivial to us, it’s not to them. Plus it takes away an opportunity to help them deal with their emotions in a helpful manner. This can have ramifications for a life time. read more

How To Stop A Child From Getting Angry

I’ve talked before about what to do when a child gets angry. How to deal with it and what to say. If you want to check it out, you can find it here. Today though, I wanted to talk about preventing our kids from getting angry. First I’ll show how it works, and then we’ll talk about how we got to that point.

It had been a long day for Jay, my son. He’d started the morning with a tuition session. It was only two hours. Normally he’d come home afterwards to play games and relax at home. Perhaps he’d have lunch out first, but not always. read more

Why You Shouldn’t Tell A Child They Can’t Sing

I can’t sing. I can’t dance. And I can’t play a musical instrument. How do I know? Well, since I was young I’ve been told I can’t. So obviously I can’t, right?

That seems to be the problem. Since I, and many others are told from young that we can’t sing. Or at least told we don’t have the talent to sing or play music. This makes us believe that’s true. But is it really true? That’s the question some people are asking now. Are we creating self-fulfilling prophecies by telling our kids that they can’t sing? And even if we aren’t creating that, are we stopping them from enjoying an important part of their lives. read more

How To Not Yell At Your Child

I’ve always had a bit of a reputation as someone who is calm and patient, especially with kids. Other people’s kids at least. See, once my son, Jay, came along, that all seems to have changed. No longer am I the person who could put up with whatever might happen. My inner Hulk seems to be constantly looking for excuses to raise his ugly head, and the yelling starts. Fortunately, for both Jay and myself, I’m starting to learn to tame that monster, and I wanted to share some of the techniques I’m using to do that. read more

5 Things To Know About An Anxious Child

I suffer from anxiety. There I said it, and I’m still here. Sure, my heart’s racing, my breathing’s shallow and I’m starting to sweat quite a bit, but I’m handling it. It’s something I’ve dealt with since childhood and I doubt I’ll ever get over it.

What about the kids out there who are suffering from it now though? What can we as parents do to help them? It’s a bit late for me, but if you have a child who’s suffering from anxiety, here are a few things I wish people around me had known while I was growing up, and some tips on how to handle it. read more

Shaping A Child’s Happiness Throughout Life With Parental Affection

It’s 6.30am and I’m standing at the side of the road with Jay, my son, waiting for his school bus to arrive. With his back to me, I slip my arms around his shoulders and kiss the top of his head. It’s become a ritual that we do most days, and something I think we both get something out of. The simple act of affection, physical contact, gives us a bond that I’m hoping will last a lifetime. It’s also something that benefits both of us on a psychological and physical level.

For now I’m going to focus on how it will affect Jay, and can affect all children, in their future lives. read more

How To Calm An Angry Child

Jay, my son, is a typical child, at least that’s what I tell myself. One minute everything’s fine, and the next, all hell breaks loose. Sometimes I have no idea what happened, all I know is that he’s gone from smiling and happy, to a monster in boy clothes.

Fortunately, over the last few months we’ve been able to reduce the times he loses his cool, and when he does he’s no longer the monster he was. How did we do it, I pretend to hear you ask? We talked to him and gave him alternative ways to handle his emotions. Part of which was the way we deal with him and what we say. Below are some of the phrases that my wife, SO, found from Psychologist Renee Jain, and that we have been trying to use when needed. read more

Teaching A Child Not To Swear

Junior’s sitting in front of the TV, playing a video game, and out it comes, swearing at the characters or other players. You don’t know where he learnt those words, and his father’s no help, he’s mysteriously disappeared, so you know he didn’t teach him. Must have got it from all those youtube videos he’s been watching, right? At least that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it.

Okay, I admit it, I have on occasion sworn in front of Jay, my son (that didn’t last long, did it?). And he’s picked some of it up from me. Some are from youtube videos that we haven’t caught, but I do take the main responsibility.  He’s heard me do it, and by consequence it’s become normal for him. The problem now, though, is what to do about it. read more

Teaching Children Road Safety

It’s something I see everyday, people crossing the road in unsafe places. Unfortunately, the majority of these people are with young children, and it amazes me how cavalier they are, not only about their safety, but the child’s safety as well.

As responsible adults, our first instinct should be to protect our children, not put them in unnecessary danger. And just so everyone’s clear, we live in an area where we are never more than 100 meters away from the nearest traffic lights, and clearly marked and regulated crossings. read more

Preparing Your Child If He Gets Lost

We’re walking through the local mall, and looking down, I realise my son, Jay, isn’t next to me anymore. My heart plummets, my pulse is racing, as I spin on the spot, eyes searching, body moving in to overdrive as panic overwhelms me. It only takes a moment to find him, looking in the window of the nearby games store, but the damage has been done as my body spends the next half hour in hyper-alert, watching him every second, every movement.

It’s a parent’s worst fear. We lose sight of them for a moment and their gone. It’s something my wife, SO, and I have kept in mind since we first welcomed him into the world. And it’s something that we have prepared for. read more