I was recently sent a video with 9 things to say to your kids everyday. I thought it was a good list so I thought I’d put the list up here, with a couple of additions that I think are just as, if not more, important to say to our children (or at least in their presence).
And even though the title says everyday, I think the problem with that is that we run the risk of losing the emotion and thus the results if we try to say all of them everyday, as they lose their meaning when repeated to often and at the wrong times. Some, like the first on the list, I try to say everyday, but others are more of a weekly thing.
So, without further babbling, here is the list:
1. I Love You
What could be more important than letting your little one know you love them, and whilst we may show them our love everyday, I think it’s also important to say the words. This is something my wife and I do everyday, usually multiple times, and Jay also says it to us without prompting.
2. I Like It When
This is straight up positive reinforcement and can be used to modify or encourage good behaviour. But more importantly, it tells our children that we are paying attention to what they’re doing and care about what they do.
3. You Make Me Happy
This is a great, and simple, way to tell the little one they are important to you. This can also be used similar to number 2 above, such as “you make me happy when…”, but I think just saying it without the qualifier can be just as important. If I’m asked “how?” my response is “just by being you”.
4. I’m Proud Of You
This is great to use when my son is struggling with something, he doesn’t have to be succeeding for me to say it, as long as he is trying hard. It’s also something positive to say when he admits he did something wrong, it encourages him to tell the truth, without condoning the bad behaviour.
5. You Are Special
No matter what happens, our children should always feel that they are special, at least to their parents if not to anyone else. This is another way of saying we love our kids and that’s why they are special.
6. I Trust You
If we want to have a trusting relationship with our children, we have to give trust if we want to receive it. This will encourage and develop a trusting and honest relationship that will help them with further relationships down the line.
7. I Believe In You
This is a great way to encourage our kids, provided we also combine it with an acceptance that success is not always possible. The last thing we want is to create shame or a sense of failure when they don’t succeed. There are no greatly successful people who have never suffered defeat and it’s a lesson that should make them stronger, not weaker. By believing in my son I’m telling him I know he will do his best, and when that’s not good enough, he will work so that next time he will do better.
8. I Know You Can Do This
This is pretty much the same as number 7, but this time there is a certainty in a positive outcome. A great way to encourage and motivate.
9. I Am Grateful For You
This is similar to number 3, another way to say our children make us happy. But there’s an extra dimension to it, something that says you are happy they are part of your life, and you’d be lacking something if they weren’t there.
10. I’m Sorry
This is a great way to teach humility. And I don’t just mean saying to my son, but having him hear me say it to others. We all make mistakes and admitting them is part of growing up. The best way for little ones to learn that is by example. It lets them know that we all make mistakes and we can all take responsibility for them.
11. Thank You
A common courtesy that is all to often missing in today’s world. It’s a simple gesture that is the basis of a polite society, and I do want my son to be part of such a society. A way to let others know we value their time and efforts and takes nothing from us but can mean a great deal to others.
